Tweek's fingers tapped against the steering wheel of his car as he and Kyle sat in the parking lot outside of Cartman's dorm. Kyle had needed a ride, and although Tweek hadn't been happy to hear he'd been lying and seeing Cartman again, he was at least glad to know Kyle had changed his mind. That he wanted to break up with him for good this time.
"Should I come in? Or stay here?" he asked, looking all around the car like Cartman was going to rip the doors off the hinges at any second.
"I told you; I'm going to go inside, explain that I don't want us to be together anymore, and then leave. It'll take five minutes."
"I just don't know if he's going to take it so well, because of---er how he is. You could just call him. Minimize the risk."
"What can he do? We're in public. And if I call, it won't feel real." He wasn't sure it would feel real either way, but at least there was a chance. He needed to make sure Cartman knew he was serious.
"Yeah." Tweek relaxed a bit. "I still can't believe you were seeing him again. It just---I mean, why?" Kyle didn't have an answer that sounded like he wasn't fishing for compliments.
"I know, I know. That's why I'm doing this. So just wait here." Kyle said, unbuckling his seatbelt. It felt good to comfort someone else. It made him feel like he was beyond needing comfort himself.
He'd never been to Cartman's dorm before, but it was easy enough to find. He'd spent half the night that he couldn't sleep on Colorado State's webpage looking at maps of the campus.
He knocked on the dorm room door.
"'Ey, we're busy in here goddamnit!" Cartman shouted through the door.
"It's me," Kyle yelled. If that alone ever mattered to Cartman, he hoped it still did.
Cartman opened the door, his hair hanging in his face, and his pants unbuckled. On his bed was a blonde guy who was covering himself in a sheet. He almost looked like Butters. Kyle wasn't surprised.
"Couldn't wait another day for my cock?" Cartman said, grabbing Kyle by the arm and pulling him into the room.
"I need to talk to you," Kyle said. "Alone." He watched the stranger slide out from under the sheet and expected to feel betrayed, outraged that Cartman had done this to him. Was probably doing it the whole time. But Kyle just felt bored. How had he ever thought he needed this? The blonde grabbed his jeans from the floor of the dorm.
"What, you come in here and boss around my friends? No. What do you want Kahl?" Cartman's eyes were always so soulless.
"That we're done. That this is over." There should be fireworks. There should be someone pulling champagne poppers.
Cartman rolled his eyes. "Do you think I care that much about you?" Cartman yelled, grabbing Kyle harder and throwing him into the computer desk in the corner of the room. Kyle's collar bone connected to the cheap plywood edge of the desk and he fell to the floor. Cartman stood over him. "It always has to be about what you want Kyle! Doesn't it?"
"Jesus Christ!" The blonde yelled. "I'm going to get someone."
Kyle laughed, grabbing the bedframe to help him stand up.
He shoved Cartman away from him as hard as he could. Cartman stumbled. "Don't you ever fucking touch me again!" Kyle yelled, needing to say the words even if Cartman wasn't going to listen to them. Cartman backed up and held the door open.
"Like I want to anyway. Get out of here, just go, you just ruined what was shaping up to be a perfectly good blowjob. Have fun getting fucked over by Stan again. Can't say you don't deserve it." But Kyle was done listening to what Cartman thought about anything. Stan was irrelevant to their relationship. He was done being Cartman's punching bag.
Kyle did go. People were gathered in the hallway looking for the source of the yelling. Outside the air was cold, and he knew he wasn't bleeding, he didn't have to check.
Tweek was waiting.
"So it's over?" Tweek asked.
"Thank Christ," Tweek muttered, shifting the car into gear and pulling out of the parking lot. Kyle felt like a 300-pound weight had been taken off of his chest.